Questions and Answers
by Freakishly Human
Summary: Ask Fred and George questions, and they will answer! Simple as that.
1. Ask us

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, damn shame...  
  
Fred "Well we promised no more speeches, but we have something new." George "Yes after our speech we received at least one question." Fred "So we have decided that we will answer questions as often as we can." George "Simply post your question in a review, and we will try and answer." Fred "We won't give out the secret recipes to our pranks though." George "Quite right, business you know."  
  
Fred "So on with the only question, why are we opposed to Alicia/ George. I will let George answer that one!" George "Well Alicia is really great person, an excellent chaser, and she has very nice hair, but she is quite taken with Oliver Wood. Besides all you fan girls out there want a chance with me, right? wink Fred "Well now that George is done hitting on the fan girls the floor is now open for other questions."  
  
Freakishly Human "You heard them, start asking!" 


	2. Questions, Questions, Questions

Disclaimer: I STILL do not own Harry Potter sobs. Oh well, on with the questions.  
  
George "Well we have some questions that must be answered!" Fred "The first one is from D.R Brook, ?userid=301044  
  
D.R Brook "If Percy was a girl, and had no relation to Fred and George, would they go out with her?"  
  
Fred "Maybe..." George "If she were the last girl on the planet..." Fred "And we had to in order to save all of mankind..." George "And even then only if we were going to be paid very well for it." Fred "Wait...does Purcilla look the same as Percy? Or is she hot?" George "Moving on to the next question..." Fred "Oh right!"  
  
George "The next question is from Lucia Lenore."  
  
Lucia: My question is for Fred! Uhmm i was wondering if you weren't to busy if maybe you would like to get a soda and bring George for my friend Missy! thanks!  
  
Fred "Sounds like a plan! What kind of soda would you like?" George "I would like cherry soda." Fred "I wasn't asking you." George "Oh I see how it is!" Fred "Next question."  
  
George "The next...questions are from Akira-Asakura-47, ?userid=533211  
  
Akira-Asakura-47 "Okay, question for both of them... Well, I'm sort of short on memory, so um...Well... Who the Hell is Katie Bell? I found a site dedicated to George and Katie pairing fan fictions... And that was right when I was about to start a fiction with a slight pairing with George and my OC. (Isn't it just cruel how fate twists?) Anyway, second question, for George... Do you mind if I sort of have you like my character? See, I'm nice enough to ask. big smile with a halo and fluffy, white wings Pretty please? (That was quite pathetic... XD)Um... What else? Oh yeah, um, for both of you again... How old are you guys in the Fifth Book? I can't remember when you guys graduate... And I searched all over the 1rst book, but it didn't tell your ages... I would check the Fifth book, but it's too big... ;; I need to know... So I can make sure of your ages for fics to come... sniff-sniff I'll never get my fics started if I don't even know your ages...10 seconds later Okay, so that's it... Sorry for making it so horribly long... I swear I'll never do this again! cough-yeah right- cough Bye-bye!"  
  
Fred "Katie Bell is a chaser on the Gryffindor Quidditch team." George "Yes, quite a lovely girl." Fred "The next question is directed at you George." George "Yes, I noticed, and my answer is no I do not mind. The only people I mind being paired with...well that's a different story..." Fred "We are seventeen in book five." George "At last old enough to do magic outside of school." Fred "Naturally we haven't been abusing this or causing any problems at all." George "Would we do that?" Fred "It seems we have run out of questions, so lets go get started on making those disappearing pants." George "I was hoping we would work on the top secret project...Anyway Keep the questions coming!" 


	3. More Questions, More Answers

Disclaimer: I own my socks, and that's about it.

Fred "Nice socks Freakish!"

FreakishlyHuman "Thanks"

Fred "Don't mention it."

FreakishlyHuman "I'm not giving you a raise."

Fred "It was worth a shot."

FreakishlyHuman "Get to the questions."

Fred "Sure thing boss."

George "Sorry I am late."

Fred "I tried complimenting her socks, didn't work."

George "Next time try her hair."

Fred "Will do!"

FreakishlyHuman "On with the questions!"

George "Our first question is from baka-ningen-14, ?userid=437749

Baka-Ningen- 14 "okay, i have questions for both of you... george: who at hogwarts do you like? if you dont like any one, i have a friend who likes you... fred: would you like to go out for dinner sometime? because i think you rock! (and you are really hot...)" 

George "Well, that is top secret information!" 

Fred "Nah it isn't, he likes Katie." George "Well maybe a little." Fred "As for the second question, dinner would be lovely!" 

George "Fred have you read all the questions on the list?" 

Fred "Nope, do I look like Percy?" 

George "Good point…" 

Fred "Why do you ask anyway?" 

George "No reason, on to the next question." 

Fred "Anyway, the next question is from Stroppy-Teenager, ?userid=584907 

Stroppy-Teenager "Have you guys ever pranked Dumbledore? Or Snape? Or any members of staff? If you have, what did you do?" 

George "Of course, we couldn't possibly call ourselves pranksters if we never pulled pranks on professors." 

Fred "We do not discriminate, we are offer completely equal pranking opportunities!" 

George "While we can't list everything we have ever done we can name a few of our favorites." 

Fred "Ah, memories." 

George "Like the time that we snuck into Snape's office and relabled all his ingredients." 

Fred "He was furious, though there wasn't ever any proof we did it." 

George "There is also the time we made those shoelaces that trip whoever uses them." 

Fred "Lucky for us, Dumbledore has a sense of humor." 

George "Anyway, you can learn more of our earlier pranks, we have been telling FreakishlyHuman all about them and she has been writing a fic about them on this very site." 

George "The next question is from Joysong, ?userid=604914" Joysong 

"Fred, are you aware that you signed a marriage contract with me two years ago!? YOU KEEP UP TO IT BOY! And George, dear, how is your spleen?" 

Fred "A marriage contract? That's what that was? Ah well, you are dead sexy Joysong, so I can deal!" 

George "My spleen is lovely, I think, thank you for asking!" 

Fred "And with that we reach the final question." 

George "Yes this one is from, Unmade Desire." 

Unmade Desire "hi what book do you graduate in? i' m totally confused.how's buisness and would you ever consider letting ginny sell stuff (i.e. candy jewellry) in ur shop?" 

Fred "Technically we do not graduate, we leave in book five after causing Umbridge as much trouble as possible first." 

George "Business is excellent, and while we are on the subject we have a new stock of Fireworks made, if anyone wants to buy any!" 

Fred "We would both be unbelievably proud if Ginny wanted to put anything in our shop, but it would have to have prankster quality." 

George "So that is all for the most recent questions, keep on asking, we will keep on answering!" 


	4. And so it continues

Disclaimer: Today I own a pair of dirty socks. Still not Harry Potter though.  
  
Fred "I just want to take this moment to thank you all for the questions."  
  
George "Yes, keep it up!"  
  
Fred "Our first question is from Wolf of light, ?userid=457287  
  
Wolf of Light "To both: What would you suggest for pranking each of the below. Their names have been censored to be kind.  
  
Whip obssesor (Filch)  
  
Greasy haired slavedriver(snape)  
  
Now insane (Umbridge)  
  
George "Well anything that would enrage them is always effective. Stuff they can't fix easily."  
  
Fred "Like in the case of the Now Insane, setting lose fireworks, and creating swamps are quite lovely methods."  
  
George "For future pranking reference look for the upcoming fiction by Freakishly Human."  
  
Fred "It will have all the information about the pranks you don't already know about!"  
  
George "Our next question is from LaChupaCabre."  
  
LaChupaCabre "choose better questions to answer.. the liking people and stuff questions are kinda dumb, Anyways, i gotta question:  
  
Who would win a 100m race, a chicken with its legs tied together of a tortoise with an impediment charm on it?"  
  
Fred "Well we are trying to answer all questions, though the romance stuff is getting a bit out of hand, we can't date all of you lovely ladies."  
  
George "And we would be murdered if we tried to."  
  
Fred "Anyway I think that the tortoise has a better chance, what do you think George?"  
  
George "Well the chicken might be able to win if it were a downhill race, the chicken could just roll down the hill."  
  
Fred "Good point, but let's keep this moving."  
  
George "Yeah I have a feeling the next few days are going to leave us feeling very sleep deprived."  
  
Fred "The next question is from Red Roses2."  
  
Red Roses2 "(Is slightly feeling out of place since there are so many Fred and George lovers asking questions, and she's Sirius, Harry, and Ron crazy) I have a question for you guys, obviously. Have you ever pulled any pranks in the Muggle way? Like, on Percy or someone in your family? If you have, what was it? Did you get in trouble with Mrs. Weasley? I'd like to know so I can prank my little sister, but I'm not a witch, so it's a little harder for me. Especially since there aren't any joke shops near by. Oh, and does Ron really like Hermione in a romantic way? Or is he just being over- protective of his female best friend like he is with Ginny? Just wondering.  
  
George "Wow, well we have pulled plenty of pranks, but many of our pranks tend to be magical."  
  
Fred "We have pulled many pranks on Percy in particular, like sending him dragon dung."  
  
George "You might try a prank like that through muggle post, like send your sister a letter saying she's accepted to Hogwarts."  
  
Fred "Or a letter saying she's won some contest."  
  
George "Have fun with it, and be creative."  
  
Fred "As for the second half of the question, we are always in trouble with Mum, it is really hard to keep track of what for."  
  
George "And we honestly don't know the relationship between Ron and Hermione, he does seem to like her quite a bit."  
  
Fred "And we have another question from Red Rose2."  
  
Red Rose2 "I forgot a question. Have you two ever considered playing matchmaker? (Smiles mischievously at the thought and chuckled) It would just be so funny."  
  
George "We have never considered that."  
  
Fred "I do not think we will."  
  
George "We already have enough to do, but you can ask Percy if he will do it."  
  
Fred "Though be prepared for very boring couples."  
  
George "Next we have a statement to Fred from Lucia Lenore."  
  
Lucia: FRED YOUR CHEATING ON ME!?!?!?!?!!? HOW DARE YOU! Your a-a-a-a-a A MEANIE! I NEVER WANNA SEE YOU AGAIN!  
  
Fred "Awww want a twinkie?!"  
  
George "I will let you work that one out, moving on we have a question from Teddybeardancer."  
  
Teddybeardancer "OK i have 2 questions. Are U 2 ticklish and if u r where? And how come you never prank Bill or charlie in the books? OK maybe those were three questions. But answer them still!"  
  
Fred "That is top secret, we will never tell!"  
  
George "It isn't smart information to reveal to the general public."  
  
Fred "And well, the books aren't about us."  
  
George "We tried to talk J.K. into writing them as Fred and George and the Sorcerer's Stone, but she didn't go for it."  
  
Fred "But as we said Freakishly Human will soon be publishing the pranks that you haven't read about in the books."  
  
George "Our next question is from HermyGWeasley, ?userid=628052"  
  
HermyGWeasley "My dear Prankster Princes, I was wondering if you knew how many Fred/Hermione and George/Hermione fics are out there (there are quite a lot). Does this information disturb or please you? Also, I was hoping maybe you would invent a toothpaste to turn teeth blue. It would be great if I could use it on my little brother. Thanks."  
  
Fred "I am not interested in Hermione Granger romantically, nor will I ever be."  
  
George "Yes this information is quite distressing, but not much we can do about it."  
  
Fred "We made our speech, which tells of our feelings on the matter."  
  
George "And yes to the second question, we could make toothpaste that turns teeth blue, or pink, or any color really."  
  
Fred "We will let you know when it is complete."  
  
George "Yes we will start on it almost immediately."  
  
Fred "The next question is from Rock Angel, ?userid=102178"  
  
Rock Angel "Ron and Hermione like each other, every one knows but them. They never stop arguing. What would you do to get them to admit to one another their feelings?"  
  
George "Very good question, and I am afraid we don't know the answer."  
  
Fred "Yes we can try and check on it and get back to you with the answer. No promises though."  
  
George "Our next question comes from LadyBlack."  
  
LadyBlack "Hey this is for George, okay...i kinda...have...fallen in love with you. and I was wonderin if your single and would like to umm maybe hang out? and now i'm done making a fool of myslef(blushing horribly) uh...bye"  
  
George "That sounds wonderful, is tomorrow night good?"  
  
Fred "Oi George, well suit yourself, but don't accept too many dates!"  
  
George "Moving on we have a question from Witch-In-Training."  
  
Witch-In-Training "hey, can you get Ron to go out with me sometime? if not, does any of you want to go out for milkshake with me?"  
  
Fred "We will check with Ron, what sort of milkshakes?"  
  
George "Yeah what sort?"  
  
Fred "Here is a question from Ashley."  
  
Ashley "Hey george remember the night before you left you spent it with a 4th year student named Ashley? Well i didn' know how to tell you this but im Pregnant, and i KNOW its yours... :( Im to young..."  
  
George "Can we refuse to comment?"  
  
Fred "In a way you just commented."  
  
George "The next question is from Kaylee."  
  
Fred "Good Save."  
  
Kaylee "HI Remember Me your Sister's Best friend? Well um yeah Did you guys know you snore wicked loud and would you be willing to bring me and Ginny to Hogsmead if we cant talk your mom into letting us go?? (we might be able too) you think she'll lets us?"  
  
Fred "Percy is the one who snores, we jynx him in his sleep."  
  
George "And I bet Ginny will be able to talk mum into it."  
  
Fred "If not we will do our best to get you there."  
  
George "Now us sleep deprived souls are going to go get some much needed rest."  
  
Fred "In the future please refrain from asking about couples, and pranks." 


	5. No More Romance Questions

Disclaimer: I own a poodle. His name is Harry Potter, but I do not own the novels.  
  
Fred "Well we are back; we have slept and are ready to tackle more questions."  
  
George "Unless of course they have to do with romances."  
  
Fred "Yes, this is the very last time we will answer any questions that have anything to do with romance."  
  
George "The pranking questions we have decided we would continue to allow."  
  
Fred "It is after all our area of expertise."  
  
George "Now to the questions."  
  
Fred "And here is one now, from LadyBlackofAzkaban, ?userid=435812  
  
LadyBlackofAzkaban "I have another question but its for Fred, My friend Tracy wants to know if Fred will go out with her. She apparantly wants to "Take him off the market for good! If you know what I mean winking and smirking"  
  
(If I were you i'd watch out for her mental that one)  
  
Your friend, Lady Black oo and George tomorrow nights great!gives George a kiss on the cheek Where ever shall we go?"  
  
George "Well I love prank stores myself."  
  
Fred "Well I sadly cannot accept any dates, I think at this point I have accepted more than what is wise for any guy to accept, especially at once."  
  
George "Now we have a question from someone who isn't asking us out, in fact we may have to give Harry her address, her name is HarryPotterObsessed."  
  
HarryPotterObsessed "Fred and George, I know you said to refrain from pranks and couple questions, but it's hard to, not that I'm gonna bother with couples questions...it's not like you two are romantically stable at the moment(Fred, I didn't know you were married)...right, would you two consider selling your merchandise in a muggle store? Even a practically harmless one?"  
  
Fred "Thank you for sparing us the couples question, and yes we would put our stuff in a muggle store."  
  
George "Of course, muggle pranksters everywhere should benefit from our high quality pranks."  
  
Fred "The next question comes from LadyFredngeorge."  
  
George "A lovely name."  
  
Ladyfredngeorge "first off you did prank bill when you put dung beetles in his soup & the sneakoscope went off and my (?) is what is the name of freaks new fic even though I do have her on my author alert it's still good to know? bye the way I love you both hence the name"  
  
Fred "Yes I had quite forgotten about that."  
  
George "It really is hard to keep track."  
  
Fred "I do believe FreakishlyHuman will be posting the prank fic under the name of The Prank Files."  
  
George "It is currently a work in progress."  
  
Fred "Should be out soon though."  
  
George "The next question is from Rock Angel, ?userid=102178  
  
Rock Angel "A fight between a vampire and a caveman who would win, and why?"  
  
Fred "Well is it day or night?"  
  
George "Does the cavemen have garlic? Or sharp fragments of wood?"  
  
Fred "A cavemen has brute strength, but Vampires are undead."  
  
George "I don't think we have enough information to go on."  
  
Fred "We can ask Lupin and get back to you."  
  
George "Or we can just say the Vampire would win and not explain why."  
  
Fred "That works, and we have another question from Akira-Asakura-47, ?userid=533211  
  
Akira-Asakura-47 "Laughs hysterically This is quite interesting... But the poor guys, they're being sleep deprived, and George is being accused of getting a girl pregnant... I wonder how Mrs. Weasley would think of this... That will be quite a scary situation... Pats Plushies designed to look like Fred&George Poor, poor boys, well that's what you get for having dated too many girls... Oh well, bye-bye, and um... I hope you guys survive the next few chapters! "  
  
Fred "Well George hasn't dated that many girls honestly."  
  
George "Nor do I sleep with random girls."  
  
Fred "Yes George really isn't the type too, nor would he deny it if it were true."  
  
George "I may be a prankster, but some things just shouldn't be joked about."  
  
Fred "Seriously."  
  
George "The next question is from Kaylee."  
  
Kaylee "Dear Fred, and George, Me and Ginny got to go, but guess what we know how you got your money... we heard ROn and HArry talking about it. Can you please take that spell off of Percy before I have to hex you myself. And me and Ginny saw a store that you guys could use to open your shop If your interested let us know. And guess what GInny has a BOYFRIEND! "Dont tell them that Kay! hi Fred,George...my two big brothers"  
  
Fred "Well we hope you were productive while you were there."  
  
George "What spell?"  
  
Fred "We wouldn't hex Percy!"  
  
George "He is our most favorite brother!"  
  
Fred "Hmmm as interested as I am in knowing who Ginny is dating we have banned romance as a general topic, so I will not ask."  
  
George "The next question will be ignored."  
  
Ashley "Actually its your or Draco Malfoy's but if you dont want it I can kill it is that what you want?"  
  
Fred "Kiara has a question."  
  
Kiara "Hey Guys! Guess what I am your niece! I am your brother Bills daughter Im not kidding. He just found out not to long ago when my mother gave me to him because she was real sick, I am 8 years old and you can call me Kia. I was wondering do you think I can hang out with you guys, and meet everyone else? Or will they hate me? My dad said you two would probably understand the best. Write back Kia"  
  
George "You can hang out with us."  
  
Fred "It's always wonderful to have another person we can lead down the path of pranksters."  
  
George "And no one will hate you, Mum will probably adore you."  
  
Fred "Come over sometime for tea."  
  
George "Our final question for tonight is from ChocolateBubbles, ?userid=536364  
  
ChocolateBubbles "Hi! Um...I was just wondering...Aren't Fred-n-George just 16? Cuz in the 5th book they're in 6th year. Cuz they wanted to not go back for 7th but said Mrs. Weasley would kill them."  
  
Fred "No we were in our seventh year during book five."  
  
George "Yes, during the summer we thought about not going back for our seventh year because we already had the money we needed for our shop."  
  
Fred "And we are in fact seventeen."  
  
George "Keep the questions coming, but remember romance questions will now be ignored." 


	6. A break

Disclaimer: I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts, they are borrowed though. I still don't own anything.  
  
George "We are back to answer more questions."  
  
Fred "And we both have hot dates, so we will get right to it."  
  
George "The first question is from ladyfredandgeorge."  
  
Ladyfredngeorge "Alright guys spill it, cough it up, give us the skinny. who thw heck is...Drumroll please...The Half Blood Prince? We know you know, come on we won't tell."  
  
Fred "Isn't it obvious? The Half Blood Prince is Nearly Headless Nick."  
  
George "What a silly question, but Fred is quite right."  
  
Fred "The next question is from Misteria Evans, ?userid=627669  
  
Misteria Evans "Are you supposed to submit your questions here?? Ok well I'm doing it anways. Do you guys ever plan on going back to school? I mean, Umbridge basically went psycho, so why not?"  
  
Fred "As we say in book five we have quite outgrown formal education."  
  
George "We do not intend on going back."  
  
Fred "Plus we have already opened our shop on Diagon Alley."  
  
George "The next question is from Naphatarie, ?userid=554039  
  
Naphatarie "hi gread and forge heres my Question if you were a yu-gi-ho guy wich one would you be ?"  
  
Fred "What is a yu-gi-ho?"  
  
George "Good question."  
  
Fred "Speaking of questions, Kaylee and Ginny have some."  
  
Kaylee and Ginny "Fred, and George, Yeah right percy is your favorite brother! Take that spell off him before I tell Mum no one near him can sleep at night! Going out BYE!" Ginny  
  
"Fred and George, See! and we were productive, we bought... well you'll find out :):) Me and ginny are better at pranks then you cuz were cute and we get out of the trouble so hahahahahaha Jk but please take that spell off him or im hexing you" Kaylee  
  
George "Ask us nicely, and we will consider it."  
  
Fred "And just because you aren't caught doesn't mean you are better at pranking."  
  
George "You young ones have a lot to learn."  
  
Fred "We now have a question from Kia."  
  
Kia "Hey Uncles! lol Thanks! you sure cuz i heard she was mean... (your mum) Dad said i can go but I have to wait till he tells everyone else which wont be till im 25 probably. I want to know everything you've done to people, and can you teach me? I have a lot of pay back... Luv Ya" Kia  
  
Fred "She is only ever mean if we provoke her."  
  
George "Which we do often I might add."  
  
Fred "She wouldn't be mean to you."  
  
George "Just read the Prank Files once FreakishlyHuman finishes them, and you will learn a lot."  
  
Fred "Our next question is from Red Roses2  
  
Red Roses2 "Can't you guys owl me a list of prank suggestions? And places where a Muggle like myself can find them? And mailing things to your own house is kind of hard the Muggle way, but I'll give it a shot. Giggles at remembering that you guys owled Percy dragon dung I just might to something similar of that to this friend of my sister's that I REALLY don't like. So you know, you guys are geniuses.   
  
George "As we said above, just read the Prank Files once they are finished, that will give you all the ideas you need."  
  
Fred "We aren't all that familiar with muggle prank shops."  
  
George "But try an internet search."  
  
Fred "I don't know if we are quite up to genius level, but I suppose that's close enough."  
  
George "And now a long winded accusation from our git of an older brother, Percy."  
  
Percy Weasley, Junior Assistant to the Minister of Magic "You two immature delinquents! If I had my way you wouldn't be allowed near the publi.... I'll make this quick. I want to spend as little time conversing with two criminals as possible: Where is Hermes? I sent him out four days ago with an important letter from the Minister of Magic himself. The Minister had expected a response two days ago, which he has yet to receive. My conclusion is that you two whelps have interfered in the delivery. It is very important that the Minister receives his messages! I'm giving you two days to return that letter with Hermes...no other owl will do. If you do, I'll have the hit wizards go easy on you two, but if you do not, I assure you that you will wish you had by the time the Ministry is through with you!!  
  
Fred "We haven't seen Hermes."  
  
George "Ya know I think long winded may have been an understatement."  
  
Fred "Yeah, I think his cauldron bottom report was better."  
  
George "How do you know?"  
  
Fred "It caught on fire faster."  
  
George "Moving on to Elizabeth Aiken, ?userid=557917  
  
Elizabeth Aiken "Ok Fred and George...uh oh yeah, I have two questions...1. If you were stranded on a desert island and can only have three of your inventions what would they be? 2. Out of your whole family who is the easiest to prank and how? wait wait there is one more That whole "sunshine dasies blah blah" where did you come up with that?!?! I think its bloody brilliant!! Signed an ever adoring fan" Elizabeth Aiken  
  
Fred "Hmmm I don't know if I could pick just three."  
  
George "As long as we had our wands..."  
  
Fred "Yes they would be useful to have, then we could just summon everything else we need."  
  
George "Percy is easy to prank, not to mention amusing."  
  
Fred "Ron used to be quite gullible though."  
  
George "On that note we just randomly put some words together, and Ron fell for it."  
  
Fred "Now we have a question from Ashley Lauren Potter."  
  
Ashley Lauren Potter "Fred and George, have you guys ever pulled a prank on Ron and Harry? If you have, what was it?"  
  
George "Well we have pulled plenty on Ron, though we have yet to pull something good on Harry."  
  
Fred "We will keep you posted on that."  
  
George "Next question is from avejofobico, ?userid=582764  
  
Avejofobico "WHAT DO YOU THINK?? SHOULD I START MY OWN NUDIST COLONY??, THE BEST PART IS THAT YOU'RE YOUR OWN BOSS AND YOU CAN HANG OUT NAKED"  
  
Fred "That is an interesting outlook on it."  
  
George "Yes by all means, start your nudist colony."  
  
Fred "Our final question is from, LadyBlackofAzkaban, ?userid=435812  
  
LadyBlackofAzkaban "Hey there guys, My question is for the both of you,I need a really good prank to pull on an old enemy but you have to think muggle wise, since magic is forbidden out side of skool. Thankx Lots of Love" -Lady Black-  
  
Fred "Well we don't know much about muggle pranking methods."  
  
George "Sorry we couldn't be of much assistance, though we are going to research this subject further."  
  
Fred "We also regret to announce that the questions will have to be put on hold for a while."  
  
George "We are now devoting our time to giving FreakishlyHuman details of the pranks you don't know about, so that she can get the first chapter of The Prank Files written."  
  
Fred "Thank you all for submitting your questions."  
  
George "We will let everyone know when we can answer some more." 


	7. We are back!

Disclaimer: All I own is lint. I don't own Harry Potter, just lint. That makes me so sad.  
  
Fred "Well since no one really listened and continued asking questions we have decided to answer them."  
  
George "Next time we say we're on a break please believe us."  
  
Fred "Or we won't answer any of your questions."  
  
George "Now moving on to the fun stuff, the first question is from Kaylee."  
  
Kaylee "Fred and George,You might want to be careful on your dates tonight... Lol We have sone things planned. And Ginny wants to know is it true you have a niece  
  
Fred "It would seem so."  
  
George "But this isn't an ask Bill column now is it?"  
  
Fred "Moving on to a question from Kia, though it is more of a statement."  
  
George "In the future try and stick to questions only."  
  
Kia "Uncles, ok I was just worried. But you guys seem cool. Dad told me alot about you guys and how Ron is friends with Harry Potter thats so cool! I also heard how you guys left school thats cool I wish I could. I want to be just like you two. We might be coming to be visit. Dad is nervous tho. Bye Luv Ya"  
  
Fred "Well even if it isn't a question, she's got her priorities straight."  
  
George "We would be so proud if you turned out like us."  
  
Fred "We encourage everyone to follow in our footsteps."  
  
George "Now we have a question from gashlycrumb-tinie, ?userid=420219  
  
gashlycrumb-tinie "Hi! ::waves:: Please excuse my hyper, addness. Well I have a question. I swear it has nothing to do with romance or pranks. Do you guys ever listen to music? If so, what type? I know you guys don't listen to muggle music, so what do you listen to? I just made a batch of cookies. Would you like one, or ::cough:: two?"  
  
Fred "Well at home we listen to the wizard radio when mum is playing it."  
  
George "On our own time we never really listen to much though."  
  
Fred "Moving on, our next question is from Lemming of the B.D.A."  
  
Lemming of the B.D.A. "HELLO ALL! NOW YOU EVEN THOUGH MY NAME UP TOP IS LEMMING OF THE B.D.A., YOU HOTTIES CAN CALL ME LEMM. NOW DON'T THINK I'M HITTING ON YOU OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT, I JUST THINK YOU'RE HOT. ANYWAY, I HAVE SOME QUESTIONS... 1.) I'VE ALWAYS HAD THE EMPRESSION THAT WITH A SET OF BOY TWINS ONE SEEMS MESSED UP AND ONE IS PRETTY COOL, OR TOTALLY HOT! TELL ME WHICH ONE OF YOU DUDES IS THE MESSED UP ONE AND WHICH ONE IS THE AWSOME ONE? 2.) NOT TO GET ON THE SUBJECT OF "ROMANCE",(EW, JUST KIDDING), I SAW GINNY SNOGGING WITH WOOD AND EVEN GETINNG TO THIRD BASE, ( if you know what I mean). HOW DO YOU CHAPS FEEL ABOUT THAT? Bye now! keep your teeth clean!Luv ya."  
  
Fred "Well, we think we are both awesome."  
  
George "And somehow Percy got messed up."  
  
Fred "And you're next question has to do with romance, so we will not be answering it."  
  
George "Instead we will answer HermyGWeasley's ?userid=628052) question."  
  
HermyGWeasley "How long can you hold your breath?"  
  
Fred "Approximately 45 seconds for me."  
  
George "I think I have the same time."  
  
Fred "That means even our lungs are identical."  
  
George "Our next question is from Akira-Asakura-47, ?userid=533211  
  
Akira-Asakura-47 "Yes yes, I know you aren't answering questions for a while... But none the less,I have a question I really need to get straight or else my story will never come out... I thought your shop was in Hogsmeade near the Shreiking Shack, isn't it? I could've sworn it was... Please, I need to know... Soon if possible...Thanks... Oh and last time I sent in a review, it wasn't actually a question,just a review to the story itself... Oh well, too late for that... Bye-bye!"  
  
Fred "Seriously, our shop is on Diagon Alley."  
  
George "The following is quoted from Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix."  
  
career advice page 675  
  
"If anyone fancies buying a portable swamp, as demonstrated upstairs, come to number ninety-three, Diagon Alley -- Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes," he said in a loud voice. "Our new premises!"  
  
Fred "There you have it; our shop is on Diagon Alley."  
  
George "Next we have an answer to one of the questions we asked about a question that we had asked."  
  
Naphatarie ?userid=554039) "its a muggle anime"  
  
Fred "This was the question that asked us what yu-gi-oh guy we would be."  
  
George "Our source, FreakishlyHuman, has informed us that a muggle anime is something that muggles watch on the television."  
  
Fred "We are not muggles so therefore we do not know what yu-gi-oh character we would be."  
  
George "Now i-love-cow-tipping, ?userid=578166, would like to ask a question."  
  
i-love-cow-tipping "George, what is your shoe size? And Fred, can you put both legs behind your head while eating chicken. I would really like a mental image of that."  
  
George "My shoe size is twelve."  
  
Fred "Well I can't say I have ever tried the first part, but I have eaten chicken."  
  
George "Now we have a statement from teddybeardancer."  
  
Teddybeardancer "Answer my previous question or else I will personally wring your necks if I don't set a mad Mrs.Weasely on you first. Mwahahahahaha! (cough, cough) U will pay! (Chokes and dies)"  
  
Fred "The spots we are ticklish in are strictly confidential."  
  
George "And there are only so many ways mum could kill us."  
  
Fred "And we have another statement from Ginny."  
  
Ginny "Please take the spell off I will do anything. Or Mum will find out about your sack of money"  
  
George "If we take the spell of Percy we will put it on you or Ron instead."  
  
Fred "And Mum will kill Harry, cause he is the one who gave us the money."  
  
George "Those are all the questions for now."  
  
Fred "Updates will continue to be slow."  
  
George "Also we want to add that the purpose of this isn't to have regular conversations with us."  
  
Fred "So keeping to questions only would be good."  
  
George "We will start ignoring any statements if we have to."  
  
Fred "One more thing, try to keep the questions as closely related to the books as possible."  
  
George "We love other characters and all, but we can't exactly answer questions related to them."  
  
Fred "Yes and try and refrain from asking us questions that should be directed at different characters from the books."  
  
George "This is for asking us questions about, well, us."  
  
Fred "If you ask FreakishlyHuman nicely maybe she will set up something with other characters."  
  
George "Though she really doesn't get enough sleep as it is."  
  
Fred "Bye everyone." 


	8. More and More

Disclaimer: I own some money now! But not enough to buy the rights for Harry Potter, any donations? looks hopeful  
  
Fred "We are back, sorry it took us so long."  
  
George "FreakishlyHuman made us clean her room."  
  
Fred "For a few days we weren't sure if we would make it out of there alive.  
  
George "Our first question is from i-love-cow-tipping, ?userid=578166."  
  
i-love-cow-tipping "hey ur back! oh kewl, here goes: which one of u is older? (i mean i know ur twins, but one of u had to come first)"  
  
Fred "I am older by five minutes."  
  
George "That was easy, our next question is from Elizabeth Aiken, ?userid=557917."  
  
Elizabeth Aiken "Hi Fred and George, it's me again. I hav thought of yet another question. And the question is...I was wandering if you were looking for an employe for your joke shop?? please I would love to work with you guys! -/) Signed Elizabeth Aiken, Now Executive President of FWAP...don't ask...  
  
Fred "I am sorry, but we currently are not hiring at the moment."  
  
George "We will be sure to mention it if we ever need help."  
  
Fred "Moving on to some questions from Kia."  
  
Kia "Fine you want some questions here: 1. What is your favorite color? 2. What is the stupidest thing you have ever done? 3. What is your birthday? 9maybe you'll get a gift) 4. What are your middle names? 5. What happen to my great grandparents?"  
  
George "My favorite color is green."  
  
Fred "Mine is blue."  
  
Fred "The stupidest thing either of us has ever done is claiming Percy as a brother."  
  
George "Our birthday is April First."  
  
Fred "That is top secret info."  
  
George "The last one we are not sure one."  
  
Fred "Now we have some questions from someone who is obsessed with dental hygiene, Lemming of the B.D.A."  
  
Lemming of the B.D.A. "HELLO ALL! IT'S ME AGAIN!:) MISSED ME? ANYWAY IF YOUR LOOKING 4 LUV THEN WHY DO YOU CENSOR THE SUBJECT IN YOU IN YOUR QUESTION AND ANSWER THING??!:"( BECAUSE I THINK YOU 2 ARE DAMN SEXY!:) ON A DIFFERENT SUBJECT, 1.) THIS WAS FUNNY AND 2.) PLEASE UP- DATE ON THY QUESTION AND ANSWER THINGY... IT'S SO FUN!:) WELL BYE NOW! KEEP YOUR TEETH CLEAN!:) LEMMING OF THE B.D.A.  
  
George "We were getting a lot of questions about other peoples romances."  
  
Fred "We were also being asked out by everyone."  
  
George "If we said yes to everyone, we would get killed."  
  
Fred "If we said no to everyone, we would get killed."  
  
George "Another question from lemming."  
  
Lemming of the B.D.A. "HELLO ALL!! LOOK GUY'S, MY STUDIO AUDIENCE JUST WANT'S TO ASK WHY THE HELL WON'T YOU GET TOO DEEP INTO TALKING ABOUT YOU'RE OWN PERSONAL EXPRIENCES AND FEELINGS AND SUCH?! GET IN TOUCH WITH YOUR TRUE FEELS BOYS!! GET IN TOUCH! DON'T BE AFRAID OF BEING YOURSELF! HAVE YOU BOYS EVER BEEN IN A ROCK BAND?! OH AND NOT TO HIT A SOR SUBJECT, BUT IT WAS ACTUALLY 2ND BASE! SO SORRY! BYE NOW! KEEP YOUR TEETH CLEAN! XO,"  
  
Fred "We can't do really long in depth answers in this."  
  
George "We have lives, a prank shop to run, and we do need sleep every so often."  
  
Fred "Besides feelings are kind of boring to talk about."  
  
George "Now we have a question from Lilly K, ?userid=639757  
  
Lilly K "fred and george. if you could change one thing, and only ONE about hogwarts... what would it be?"  
  
Fred "We would replace Filch with a very pleasant good looking woman who gave out sweets every day."  
  
George "Yeah, we should really try that."  
  
Fred "Though we aren't at Hogwarts anymore."  
  
George "Good point."  
  
Fred "Anyway, ask more, we will answer more."  
  
George "It will be delayed a bit though." 


	9. The End

Disclaimer: I do not own anything but a wee lil sketch book full of nude sketches of Fred and George.

FreakishlyHuman "Well everyone, I regret to announce that this is the very last chapter ever for this fiction. You may of course continue to ask questions, and I know that many of you will, but no more of them will be answered. I am very sorry for this, but I am becoming a very busy person and so alas I no longer have time. On to the questions, and thank you all."

George "So with that out of the way we can go on to the question from LadyBlackofAzkaban, ?userid=435812.

LadyBlackofAzkaban "You all MUST answer this one! Okay this is for the both of you to decided. Who's funier? And dont give me this we're equal cuz I know that ONE of you is funnier but I need your opinion."

Fred "Wow."

George "I really don't know."

Fred "Never really thought about it myself."

George "Neither have I."

Fred "I don't think I can answer that one."

George "Because we both know I am loads funnier."

Fred "Alright, well I'm the better looking one then."

George "Sounds fair."

Fred "Now we have some questions from Lemming of the B.D.A."

Lemming of the B.D.A. "HELLO ALL! IT'S THE LOVEABLE LEMSTER!

SO TELL ME THIS...1.) WHY THE HELL DID YOU NOT ANSWER THE QUESTION ABOUT BEING IN A BAND?! 2.) IF YOU EVER HAVE BEEN IN A BAND, WILL YOU BE IN MINE?! 3.) HAVE YOU EVER DONE CALIGRAPHY? AND IF SO CAN U TEACH ME 4.) TRY AND GUESS WHAT B.D.A. STANDS 4. OK BOYS PLEASE DON'T HURT MY FEELINGS BY NOT ANSWERING SOME OF MY QUESTIONS...BUT I ASSUME BY BEING FAMOUS AND ALL YOU'RE REALLY BUSY... AND SO NO HARD FEELINGS!;) WELL BYE NOW! KEEP YOUR TEETH CLEAN!"

George "We must have overlooked it, but no we have never been in a band."

Fred "We haven't done calligraphy either, but FreakishlyHuman has."

George "B.D.A. stands for Beetle Dung Association?"

Fred "We hope we got them all this time."

George "Now we have a question from teddybeardancer."

Teddybeardancer "Please tell me! I really really want to know for a fanfiction that I want to write."

Fred "It really isn't wise to advertise where you are ticklish in something that lots of people could read."

George "We really can't tell you."

Fred "You can just make it up; I don't think people will know the difference."

George "Unless they have read this."

Fred "Next we have something from I like Pink, ?userid=642540.

I like Pink "Okay, this is a very important question and you better tell the truth. What color is better pink or purple? And don't take my name into account when you answer it.

Fred "I like purple better myself."

George "Yeah, I generally don't think about either color much."

Fred "Though it would be funny to turn Filch's hair pink."

George "Next we have a question from a weird girl aka naphatarie."

a weird girl aka naphatarie "dear guys do you like choclate or vanila icecream better?"

Fred "I love vanilla."

George "I like them both, and strawberry."

Fred "Moving on, we have a question from i-love-cow-tipping, ?userid=578166.

i-love-cow-tipping "i have a question: y are u guys talkn on the computer if ur wizards, isnt a computer a muggle thing?"

Fred "We just give FreakishlyHuman the answers."

George "Yes it really isn't us doing the typing."

Fred "Which is why this fiction will no longer be continued after this chapter, we would love to continue to answer."

George "But FreakishlyHuman is a very busy person."

Fred "So cut her some slack!"

George "Now we have a question from baka-ningen-14, ?userid=437749.

baka-ningen-14 "me again. fred, when do you want to go for dinner? and george, when did you start liking katie? and can i come to the wedding?"

George "Well those are romance questions."

Fred "Yeah and even though this is the last chapter, we did say we wouldn't be answering those anymore."

George "So this is where it ends."

Fred "Thank you for the questions."

George "I am sure that FreakishlyHuman will update some of her OTHER fictions at some point."

Fred "Bye everyone!"

George "Bye! Get in as much trouble as possible!"


End file.
